I showed up 15 minutes early. I was ready. I wore the clothes I needed to wear, had my mind in the right place, and was waiting for this girl whom I had connected with over a questionable dating app. She said she would meet me here at the high school at 7. Keep in mind this was here idea to meet at 7, not mine.
Another 15 minutes pass. She is still not here.
“Where the heck is this girl?” I think to myself as I scroll through my phone. This was looking like it was going to be yet another girl who wouldn’t show.
I had lost all patience. I was going to call this girl and see where the hell she was.
I wait for her to answer, and she answers. She doesn’t even know who it is.
“Hello, who is this?” she asks as she pretends to be coy and innocent. This girl was not innocent. She had committed a grave crime, with that crime being the standing of up an an innocent stranger, and that stranger being me.
“Hey, uhm…are you coming?” I reply to her as I manage to keep my cool at the utter lack of disprespect, decency, and humanity.
She starts to panic, I can tell. She gives me some explanation of how she basically forgot our date, and explains to me that she’s at the movies. She even had the audacity to ask me to leave my current location to meet her at her house.
I then make the mistake of having sympathy for this evil and selfish person. I ask her for her address, and she tells me to wait even longer, and she will send her address to me momentarily.
I wait, like a patient little sheep. Awaiting for the inevitable ghosting that I knew that was probably to come. Nevertheless, I wait…
Ten minutes later – no address sent. Fifteen minutes – no address. Merely an hour later, I am still waiting on this girl in this parking lot where we were supposed to meet, and absolutely no address was sent to my phone. Alas, my fair good friend, you have been ghosted yet again. Can I say again that I was not surprised?
The problem here is that dating is tough for guys. Not only that, but it is tougher for guys who are on dating apps. There are reportedly 9 times as many women as men on dating apps. So, as a man, you are basically dealing with the bottom of the bucket when you interact with these girls. They are the lowest of the low. They are not only often times borderline evil, but they do not follow any sort of moral code other than what benefits them. This is the opposite of what is virtuous. Plus, they have mental disorders.
But that is not my subject for today, ladies and gents. Although I knew this girl was likely to never show up ever because she is from a dating app, I expected her to and this threw me a curveball. This is what life does and this is what we should prepare for.
You will be on top of the world and feel as if you are invincible. You will feel that no one can rival your strength. You will be the Achilles with no Achilles heel. You wil be the invincible Chesty Puller on the battlefield. You will be the Leonidas of your loyal 300 soldiers guarding a small passageway to your homeland, but alas you too will be thrown an unexpected event, a hard time, a girl who stands you up – a curveball.
What can you do to combat “curveballs” you might ask? What can a man do to prepare for the inevitable, for something that is about to come but you don’t know exactly what is coming? Here are my ways to combat unexpected bad events in life, otherwise knows as curveballs:
- Run a hill
You might ask: what does running a hill have to do with dealing with curveballs in life? How possibly can charging up a large mound of dirt or a mountain help me deal with being stood up, or deal with something even worse, such as losing a loved one? That’s easy – it builds mental strength. There is a hill near my house, that I go to almost every day. It is a hill located within a Civil War battlefield, where thousands of men died. I go there every day and run that hill. I run it because it is a good workout, but I also run it to become mentally strong, and also to humble myself. It puts my problems into perspective, and makes me realize that a girl standing me up is not such a big deal, and in the end, it’s probably her loss anyway.
2. Meditate
This is something that I have been skipping lately, but I plan on getting back into it soon. Meditation will give you perspective on unexpected situations, and will give you perspective on life. It will allow you to look at a problem for what it is, rather than how it makes you feel. When you meditate, it also lowers your blood pressure, making you feel calm, centered, and focused.
3. Accept there are some things you change, and some things you can’t
There was a bad ass who lived in Rome 2,000 years ago. He was a great man and a great emperor. People commonly recognize him as one of the last great Roman emperors, and for good reason. He lived his life as we all strive to do here at howtogetoverabreakup.travel.blog, he made a lasting impact and his life had tremendous meaning. He developed a set of philosophies on how to live your life and developed a code to live by. His code was simple and it was this: accept there are some things in life that are out of your control and do not try to control them, only focus on changing the things in your life that you can control. This idea is called stoicism and it seems to have been a long forgotten idea, especially nowadays. Everybody wants to try and blame someone else for something. Everybody wants to blame their teacher on getting the bad grade, their parents on why they have poor eating habits, or their friends on why they can’t get girls. The fact of the matter is is that all of these things are controllable by you, and because you can control your own grades, eating habits, and ability to pick up girls you should focus on controlling those things if you want to see real change. Some things you might not be able to control are the weather, whether you get cancer or not, or whether a girl shows up to a date or not. More broadly speaking, you should accept you cannot change the actions and behaviors of other people. Some people will never change, no matter how much you want them to, and some people will continue to walk all over you no matter what you do. In my case, I know deep-down there was nothing I could do to get this girl to show up for our date that I looked so much forward to. There was nothing I could do to make her show up on time and spend time with me, or at the very least be respectful and send me a quick 2 second text message letting me know she couldn’t make it. At the end of the day people will always do what they want to do and you have to accept that. Sure, you can try to manipulate or change people behaviors by treating them in a certain way, but at the end of the day some people will not change no matter what, and that is a hard pill to swallow. We all think that we can change people, situations, and our own lives but there is an element of randomness to it we cannot control. The best thing to do is accept that element is there, and focus on what you can control. That will put you in the best possibly situation you could be in in your life, and will inevitable make you the best version of yourself, and overall a better man.
Like this post? I highly recommend you check out my other similar post, 5 Things Not To Do After A Breakup, which are five things I know you are already doing or you’re about to after your girlfriend breaks up with you, or check out 5 Rules For How To React Immediately After a Breakup, which gives you 5 solid and hard rules to follow so you know how to act and get over the breakup like a man.
Like this blog? Is it helping you get over your ex-girlfriend? Follow this blog and click follow on this page. Want to let me know what you think? Go ahead and enter in your e-mail along with your comment. Thanks, I really appreciate it.
How To Get Over a Breakup 