A man’s true character comes out when he‘s drunk.
– Charlie Chaplin
My best friend, my brother, the guy I grew up with from the age of nine and reached manhood with, was in my car, and he was sick, vomiting mysterious blue liquid everywhere, crying his eyes out as if someone told him Santa Claus wasn’t real or that he was adopted. My heart felt for him given the circumstances.
We were leaving his favorite bar that was full of trashy women, cheap beer, and even worse dancing and he had drank way too much. He drank the kind of amount you drink when you win a war and make it home to see your sweetheart again. He drank the kind of amount you drink when it is your first night at college and you have no idea what you got yourself into. It was safe to say he had a little too much to drink, and the blue liquid that was going into his system allowing him to forget all reality was going out of his system, all over the floorboard of my small, poor little car.
He apologized profusely, and told me he was sorry and he’ll clean it up, and that’s when he starting crying, and telling me he loved me. I told him I loved him too, and we drove home to end the night of mischief. On the way home he proceeded to try and text his ex, and the only thing stopping him was my sober-as-a-judge judgement telling him not to. We got home finally, and went to bed knowing although a little too much had been drunk, we were still brothers at the end of the day, and always will be.
This story is a lesson that alcohol can make you do unwise things, especially when it comes to ex-girlfriends on the night of one of the biggest parties of the year – the Super Bowl. I know many beers and shots will be taken on this historic day and night, so here are some tips for you to help you not send that dreaded text to your ex-girl who you are trying to get over that reads, “baby please come back to me I love you so much can we please get back together and alksjalfpf ei go bears.” No, that last part was not a typo, that was the text you’re going to send if you don’t follow these simple six easy-to-follow rules:
- Have a sober-as-a-judge friend with you
The only reason, and I mean the only reason my best friend and brother did not text his ex-girl that fateful night of blue vomit was because I was there to physically stop him to, and I was in a right-enough mind to act on his behalf. I suggest you have a friend there to do the same.
2. Limit your drinking to an acceptable amount
Ok, I know this one sound kind of lame. But it is probably one of the best solutions for making bad decisions while drunk, and that is limiting your drinking so you never get to that point in the first place. I am not saying not drink at all, but I am saying that drinking before you get to the point where you are crying about vomiting so much might be a wise idea. It just might be.
3. Do not have your cell phone with you while you drink
Sounds simple enough, right? If you don’t have your cell phone with you, then you can never text your ex-girlfriend in the first place, therefore preventing any unwanted unnecessary drunk communication. This works better if you have other friends there with a cell phone who have promised not to let you use theirs, so you have a cell phone with you in case of emergencies. Emergencies can definitely happen when you’re in a public place too, like a bar.
4. Turn your phone on “airplane mode”
I do this all the time when I am doing yoga, reading, working out, or doing anything where I don’t want to be bothered. There are also apps and sites you can use that restrict your internet time, so you can stay focused on your work, or in this case not texting your ex. Chances are, by the time you are many beers into the Super Bowl, you will be so drunk that you can’t figure out how to turn airplane mode off, and if you aren’t, well hey, at least it’s another barrier to you contacting your ex.
5. Make a bet with your friends
Tell your friends that you really do not want to contact your ex, and if you try to and they stop you, then you will do something you really hate doing for them in return. For example, say to one of your friends, “Hey man, I would really not like to call [insert random girl’s name here] tonight, if you stop me from calling her and make sure I don’t contact her when I’m drunk, I will wash your car next time we hang out” or something along those lines. This will:
a) give them an incentive for them to keep you from calling your ex-girl and
b) give you an incentive not to call her by forcing you to do something you hate.
This is psychology at its best.
6. Last resort – call her when you’re sober
This is a last resort option, and I mean only a last resort option. When you know you will have at least one sober friend with you, know you will not be able to keep drinking to an acceptable amount, have to have your cell phone with you, know airplane won’t keep you from calling her, and also know that there is no way in hell your friends won’t be able to stop you from calling her, you may as well call her when you’re sober. If you really wanted to call her that bad, then it’s got to be for a reason, whatever reason that may be. Maybe there is something you have to get off your chest, maybe you have to reach closure one last time before letting go, maybe there was something unresolved, whatever that may be you need to address it if it’s bothering you that bad, and it will sound a hell of a lot better when you are calling sober rather than drunk. Who knows? maybe she is just like you, and she is on some random girl’s blog in the middle of the night scouring ways to keep from calling you, and deep down she needs some closure from you too. Either way, confronting the problem straight up if it’s that big of an issue will lead you well on your way to getting over the breakup, and becoming a better man.
Like this post? I highly recommend you check out my other similar article, 5 Things Not To Do After A Breakup, which are five things I know you are already doing or you’re about to after your girlfriend breaks up with you: https://howtogetoverabreakup.travel.blog/2019/08/31/5-things-not-to-do-after-a-breakup/.
Also, check out my similar post for how to act after a breakup -https://howtogetoverabreakup.travel.blog/2019/08/25/example-post/.
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Disclaimer: I am not a doctor or medical professional. Please do not take my advice as if I was a doctor or medical professional, as I am not qualified to give that kind of health advice. Please be smart, and use your best judgement when starting a new diet/health/exercise plan and consult your doctor before starting a new diet/health/exercise plan. Thank you.
How To Get Over a Breakup 