“The course of true love did never run smooth.”
– William Shakespeare, “A Midsummer Night’s Dream”
She looked in my eyes deeply and told me how she felt, and it hurt. The fact that she seemed to be sincerely honest about how she was feeling did not help either, because I wish she was lying.
“I want to go do this, it’s my dream,” she told me calmly and quietly.
There was really no arguing with that, since you can’t argue with how someone feels, much less against what they want to do with their life and what their dreams and passions are. Her dream was to move halfway around the world after college and live in Europe indefinitely. I, of course, was not in that dream, and that hurt. A lot.
We had been dating a year, and I really liked this girl. She was different than all the others. She was weird, but not too weird – just the right amount of weird. She was cute, as well as pretty, and had a cute quirky personality that everyone liked, especially her friends. Her friends liked her so much that it grew to a point in our relationship as we grew closer that some of her more malicious friends grew jealous, and almost resentful of my existence as a human being on this Earth, and tried to sabotage the relationship. Nevertheless, she was my girl and I was in love with her, although I was beginning to wonder if she was in love with me.
We were sitting in the park on our last day together, and tears were streaming down her soft child-like cheeks as she hugged me for one last time. I had never really seen her cry before, which to me, seemed unusual for a girl to never cry. The tears streaming down her cheeks were a testament to the fact that we may never see each other again, spoke about the gravity of the situation, and the fact that I was losing a girl who I seemed to love so much and had grown so fond of. Her tears were a silent way of communicating that she knew I would never be in her life anymore, and because I loved her so much, I forced myself not to cry either. I did not want to cause her another ounce of pain beyond what she was already experiencing. It was already heartbreaking to see such a small, fragile, quirky girl who had barely shed a tear this entire relationship now in helpless tears.
I spend the next year avoiding the responsibility of moving on. I found the cost of facing the pain too much to bear, so I buried it under the rug. I metaphorically buried it inside of me, only to for it to be recovered and dealt with in a more drastic, upfront way on a later date.
Then COVID hit. As you all know, it completely changed the landscape of what it means to be alone, and this affected me in a unique way. Being alone forced me to deal with my feelings. It forced me to deal with my inner thoughts. It forced me to deal with my inner emotions, and forced me and helped me get over my breakup with my ex who seemingly left so long ago. Using mediation, prayer, being alone, working out, and diet, I felt like I was able to make progress in terms of moving on as well as becoming a better man. Here are the steps I used to get over my breakup during COVID that you can use and implement in your life as well to help you get over your already difficult breakup during a very difficult time:
- Be ok with being alone
Many people are not ok with being alone, and feel like they have to surround themselves with other people to feel whole. While being around other people like your friends and family is nice and is actually healthy, being alone and being ok with being alone is also very healthy and a vital tool for getting over your breakup during COVID. Know that when you’re alone, you can use this time for yourself to improve, grow as a person, and reflect and be in your own thoughts. Not only is this invaluable, but practicing this is psychologically healthy in my opinion.
2. Meditate
I used to think meditation was some kind of voodoo religious ritual that only people in yoga did who were hippies and liked doing drugs all day. I associated that persona with mediation, and avoided it all together. Big mistake for me. Meditation on its own in my opinion is a form of self-therapy. If you have ever gone to therapy, some types involve a therapist asking you questions the entire time so you can explore your own mind, and reach your conclusions on why you think the way you do. Mediation is the same thing except you’re alone in a room and you get to explore your own thoughts and feelings without anyone else around. Simply observing your own thoughts and processes will allow you to feel more focused, clear, and you may even reach conclusions on problems that previously seemed difficult. Research has also shown that meditation improves your ability to learn as well as overall feelings of being happy. So get a pillow, sit on it, cover your head with a blanket maybe, and do nothing.
3. Consider getting an animal
For some reason, small animals and pets seem to really make us happy. Think back to the last time you saw a 12-week-old puppy. Were you mad in that moment? Were you unhappy while you held her? Were you angry while she licked your face and likely bit everything in sight? Ok, maybe you got a little annoyed the puppy starting biting every piece of furniture in the house. But you probably got over as soon as she starting licking your face again and cuddled with you on the couch. Not only will getting a small animal such as a puppy, kitten, or even a pet pig make you feel happier on a regular basis, (yes, some people have pet pigs and they’re awesome) but this animal will give you more responsibility and something to do besides think about your ex, will give you more exercise, and will force you to go outside and enjoy the weather when you need to take her on a walk. Besides, when it’s COVID, you have to stay home all day anyway, so you may as well be in good company.
4. Call your friends/family/videochat
We are all isolated from each other for weeks at a time, but who says we can’t call one another or videochat and catch up? You may be feeling a little down about your girlfriend who dumped you, and being alone seemingly does not help your situation at all, but you can call you mom, dad, sister, brother, and any of your bros. People may even think you’re weird for calling but it’s ok. The last time I called someone I called a girl who she seemed confused that I was calling, and asked me, “is everything ok?” I replied to her everything was fine, I was just calling to talk on the phone and once we talked, it was like a breath of fresh air. We are so addicted to our phones and texting that we forget to actually use the dang things for what they were actually designed for – calling someone! So call someone, and stop feeling sad about the girl who you thought was the love of your life because I promise you there are other people out there who you can talk to and call, and they will appreciate you called when you do.
5. Watch an old movie that you used to love
When my ex left me to go live on the other side of the world for the rest of her life, as you can can imagine I was kind of down. I remember sitting on the couch one night while feeling sorry for myself, while eating salmon and brown rice with a salad. During my attempt at eating a healthy dinner, I was scouring videos on the internet when I came across an old movie that I used to love and watch as a little kid. In particular, this old movie reminded me of my mom, and when I watched it it reminded me of when my mom was young, and when she used to take care of me. A feeling of warmth and love passed over me, and it was then I realized how much I truly love my mom. Then everything else seemed insignificant. My breakup, my boring dinner, and broken heart all seemed not to matter in that moment, and I felt really good about myself and felt nostalgic when I went to bed that night. That night was one of the first steps in healing over my breakup, and it was all because of an old movie and how it reminded me of my mom.
6. Enjoy life
I know this phrase seems kind of broad, but what I really mean is enjoy the details in life that make life enjoyable for you. Enjoy the things that make life life. Enjoy small things that you take for granted and that are beyond wonderful gifts. Enjoy the weather outside, enjoy feeling the black dirt in between your fingers, enjoy getting up and being able to move around, enjoy feeling the cool air, enjoy feeling your body and being able to see, and try to do the little things that you love every day. The things I have found that make life great are the little things such as these, and being able to see, hear, smell, taste, and touch. Enjoy all of these little things, because I promise you that there are some people out there who didn’t and do not get to enjoy these wonderful and amazing gifts you have been granted each and every blessing of a day. Don’t take it for granted and appreciate it, and use this to move on, get over your breakup, and become a better man.
Want some, concrete rules and advice on how to get over a breakup with your ex-girl? Check out my rules on how you should act immediately after a breakup -https://howtogetoverabreakup.travel.blog/2019/08/25/example-post/, as well as check out the five common things/mistakes that guys do after a breakup – https://howtogetoverabreakup.travel.blog/2019/08/31/5-things-not-to-do-after-a-breakup/.
Disclaimer: I am not a doctor or medical professional. Please do not take my advice as if I were a doctor or medical professional, as I am not qualified to give that kind of health advice. Please be smart, and use your best judgement when starting a new diet/health/exercise plan and consult your doctor before starting a new diet/health/exercise plan. Thank you.
Like this blog? Is it helping you get over your ex-girlfriend? Follow this blog by clicking on https://howtogetoverabreakup.travel.blog/blog-feed/ and click follow on this page. Want to let me know what you think? Go to https://howtogetoverabreakup.travel.blog/contact/ and enter in your e-mail along with your comment. Thanks, I really appreciate it.
How To Get Over a Breakup 