New Beginnings

I woke up to feel the cool, crisp, air and the sun shining down on me. The smells of fresh cut grass wafted in my nostrils as I stretched. I felt a little wet nibble by my nose and then by my ear. It was my corgi greeting me good morning. I gave her a noogie on her furry little head, and she tried to play-bite me.

I rolled out of my delightfully warm and cozy sleeping bag under a mountain of two other comforters to put on my shoes and start my day. I have been sleeping outside of my parents house at night for the past two months in a little nook under the coolness of a neatly trimmed tree. I was busting my ass at my two jobs I was working. Although I was working remotely, my boss had managed to be the king of remote micromanaging.

That didn’t matter on this day though because it was a Saturday which means no work. What it did mean is that I should do some other things besides work-related tasks – namely go out and actually meet some people and have some real in-person interaction, and maybe even get a girlfriend.

I went to the front porch/deck to greet my mom who greeted me with a hot cup of coffee with two tablespoons of half n’ half mixed in – just how I liked it. I would need the caffeine boost for what was about to come on this hot August morning.

I diligently washed and combed my hair, put on deodorant, and put on some nice clothes before getting into my car with a green tea in hand. I didn’t want to be late for my important meeting. Little did I know at the time I did not know how important this meeting actually was, and going to it would significantly change my life for the next 8 months.

I arrived to our church meeting early – a miracle for someone who is usually as late as I am. There were two girls already under the pavilion at the park we were meeting at to greet me. One was very pretty and cute – the other was “meh.” They were both very friendly and nice and introduced themselves and I introduced myself the best I knew how. I still am that shy, awkward, blonde kid I always have been even though I appear to be a grown man on the outside, and always will be.

Then you arrived with two of your friends, and I immediately noticed your face and smile and thought you were attractive. The second thing(s) I noticed were about eight inches below your face, and I found them very attractive as well. As a man I could not help but notice you were a healthy, busty, beautiful young woman. You arrived with a very friendly smile on your face and a very innocent demeanor. You must have been very shy because you brought two of your friends, a young guy and a girl who were in a relationship with each other, to a church singles group. Your shyness only drew me in more. A shy damsel in distress? No worries, I will be your knight in shining armor, my love.

We started playing a board game, and you were on the other team. You were not supposed to help me answer the questions correctly, but you were so nice to me that you helped me anyway, despite the playful requests not to by your teammates. An attractive and beautiful young girl with a smile to die for who is also a really nice person? I was already head over boots.

I had never dated anybody as nice as you before. I might have dated girls who were pretty before, but no one who looks like you and no one who was also as nice, sweet, and caring as you are. I knew I had to get to know you better and I strategically planned in my mind to sit next to you when we were going to lunch after our board games.

We arrived to the burrito shop and you got there before anybody else and had already ordered. By the time I was making my way to the tables to sit down and talk to you (and maybe even get your number) the worst had happened – you were already gone.

My eyes searched the restaurant and I realized you already left the restaurant before I even had the chance to sit down and talk to you. Where had you gone? This is what I get for being late and a slowpoke.

I still left that burrito shop that day in love. I could not stop thinking about you and wanted to know more about you. I wanted to know if you liked me back or not, and wanted to know why you had left the burrito store so early? Maybe you had some place to go? Or maybe you just plain did not like me. Either way, I had to know and wanted to get some definitive answers. I am 29 years old at this time. I am no longer a “young buck.” I have lived some time, had some life experience, and have had experience with women, and although I am still as terrified of women as the next young lad, I am better at overcoming my fears.

So, I conjured up the bravery to text you (so brave to send a text message, huh?). I asked if you liked the meeting or something casual, and then asked the big question that this all had been leading up to – whether you would like to meet me for coffee.

“I’m sorry I don’t like to drive in the rain,” was the heart shattering response I got from you. “Is she kidding?” I thought. “Really? She doesn’t like to drive in the rain?” I just came to the simplest conclusion – you did simply did not like me.

I “took the L” and moved on with my life for the next month or so accepting defeat, like a sad little puppy. I know the importance of letting go better than I used to, and try to learn from my mistakes. If a girl is simply not into you, the best strategy is just to move on the next one. There is bound to be a girl out there that thinks you’re amazing and finds you awesome. There is something amazing within all of us that we can offer to the world. The key is finding the girl who appreciates it.

I then got an unexpected text message one month after my rejection. “Hey, are you coming to the church meeting tomorrow at the bookstore?” You remembered me. Maybe you did like me somewhat? I knew I wasn’t going to go to the next meeting, work was kicking my ass and there was no way I was getting up at 10am on a Saturday and sacrificing my sweet, sweet Saturday mornin’ beauty sleep for bookstore shenanigans. So I took another chance.

“Want to finally meet me for coffee tomorrow? Rain-free?” I texted you to make one final hail-mary of a shot. You agreed and at this point, you seemed not only agreeable to meet me, but you seemed eager.

That morning of our first date I was debating on whether I should go. I had nearly given up on dating. The last date I went on was a disaster – the chick turned out to be as crazy as a bed bug. That one gave me actual nightmares. I threw on my outfit and combed my hair, and thought to myself, “what the hell, what’s the worst that can happen?” And I walked into the door of that small coffee shop to see your smiling cute face and wonderful smile yet again, and you still looked as beautiful as ever.